Friday, November 29, 2013


September 12th 2011.

I remembered where I was. Somehow, we were actually celebrating Moon Cake Festival at the park. And we met almost everyone else from the class there too. Real couples, fake couples, sidekicks, only the nerds weren’t there.

But like so many other meaningful days after that, all I thought about was you. The parade was perfect. Even the weather cleared up just in time. The only thing missing, was you. You were out of town. You had just left that day. Flight was delayed, and you even met one infamous punk. A harmless plan gone horribly wrong, became an ill advised trip.

But no matter how minor the actual day has come to mean, it is still a celebration, a minor gathering, and I wanted you to be there so badly. This feeling of emptiness would haunt me the year after, when I returned for the real final semester.

The “Happy Mooncake Festival” message was actually sent by my cousin. I texted her to help because I couldn’t find wifi and I wouldn’t be home after 12.

The next night, me and the boys we’re out again, shopping for prom shirt. I was at the old concourse alone, I wanted internet, I needed to hear from you. Shit was, I didn’t have your number yet. Because you posted a disturbing status. I wanted to know you were okay. I went as far as asking for your best friend's help. She was always there for us. When I first gave you ice cream I "had to" give her one, then this. Even during graduation when I wanted to take picture with you, I paused and looked at her. She smiled, with approval. 

Anyway none of the messages were returned. Not mine, not hers.

And the next time I heard from you was two days after, you were home again.

It’s just funny, this suddenly came out of nowhere today. I missed the great times with the boys.  

When Mrs Myers consoled Jesse about Leslie’s death, she told Jesse the time she lost her husband. It resonated in me. It was exactly how I felt. She said “When my husband died, people kept telling me not to cry. People kept trying to help me to forget. But, I didn't wanna forget.” Bridge to Terabithia

1136148. I dug this up from archived notes, and I just put the numbers in order. 

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