Saturday, January 12, 2013

06 Working Sunday


My first ever. Working Sunday.  (Do you Want To – Franz Ferdinand)

How do you feel the difference? First off I skyped with my sister in the morning, who is in the east coast time zone, she had just got off work and was looking forward to her Sunday. Next, my old church mate posted a song, and theme which was quoted by the sermon he had heard at church this morning. And everyone else is on holiday, a few friends asked me, why are you working, its Sunday! And thinking that my parents are off at my dad’s work hostel, this feels really like a Sunday on a personal level. But add in the work element and atmosphere, it is very Monday blue. And I’m sort of undecided, on a simple matter such as what day is today!

Today Monsieur Vincent tapped me once on the shoulder on his way to the washroom. I was sort of disappointed when he stopped doing it after two days. Of course, he has to pass by my table whenever he wants to go to the toilet, but then I thought I had offended him of some sort. So you could imagine, when he tapped me this morning, I was very happy that I haven’t done anything wrong in his eyes. I mean, how many people does he has to, or doesn’t tap along his way to the toilet? And having heard rumors of him, I have no problem at all with him, I actually quite like him, and sympathetic towards him, which is why when my mother said my uncle suggested me to stay with him, I had no problem at all because I thought it would benefit him more than I do.

Today I’ve been discussing an awful lot of things with my friends about myself. And it’s not over yet. I’m supposed to call Kiong, but then I gotto charge my phone first. Sometimes, I find that when you discuss your own problems with other people, at the end of the day, it is you who answers your own question. Today, I found my answer to be very familiar.

Fear.

Fear of defeat, fear of the shame, fear of losing, fear of being lost, fear of disappointment, and fear of losing faith.

Let’s start over again. The original doubt was that I couldn’t get over myself of why I’m here. I’m here because the job prospect is good. I’m here because it is an opportunity that very few people get. But is this what I really want? I mean, I haven’t been the best trooper even in school. I don’t like all these things, and I shouldn’t even be here.

The road that this path leads to, is essentially towards destruction. It simply romanticize the problem, and thus, providing a reasonable exit out of it. I’ve said that I should trust the brain more than the heart. Now is the time.

I could see myself in such a favourable position, that when I fail, I might just use the excuse that it is not what I want. I guess at some point in our lives we just have to accept that things are not going to go the way we want it to be every single time. That is why mentality is important. Ray Lewis said “That’s what today is about. Opportunities.” I want to see this through. I could walk away anytime I could, but I might just regret it in the future. You only regret things that you didn’t do, not the things that you do. My uncle’s family was here for more than ten years. And it was worse. I’m young, I’m in the best years of my life, why can’t I? Not to put too many pressure on myself, but this might just be those one in a life time opportunity that some people get earlier in their lives, some later, and the rest never.

Now off to something lighter.

Yesterday, I was supposed to attend a mass at a Catholic chapel called St Phillip Minh. When I phoned the lady in charge she said mass time have been moved to Friday. She then pointed me the way to the church, and also asked me to call her again next Friday because she said “there are some boys might come down also”. I guess I’d be driving them. I think they should be off shore bound or back guys. I was a bit happy to be honest. The only thing I was worrying was what if I took off to Kuantan again?
I then went uptown and found the church. Chapel more like, but she mentioned church. So church it is then!
I learned a lesson too in fact. Should have called her way earlier. I wouldn’t have to leave office and could have finished that file up for May.

Earlier that morning, I took my scratched car to town, Cheok showed me the way to his friend’s workshop. Turns out his friend is the owner, and his name is Stephenz. Cool eh?

The foreman had a look, and decided for me its gonna be 300 and I should only send it to him in two Mondays because he’s got so much at his hands that he finding it hard to move cars around in his workshop. So on the way out, I thought, wow, my stupidity actually has a price, RM 300 and a week’s extra patience. Sort of around the price I expected. Remember Kahwai’s car was scratched too? I think he fixed it around that price, and that is also what my mom quoted me. So I was like okay. You know, when you feel guilty, you’d go easy on a lot of things.

But cheok was kind. He asked me at breakfast later if 300 was okay, and he was concerned that I might not have the money and he was willing to help. May was kind from the start. She laughed off my case and told me to just learn from the mistakes.

We went lunch later that day, he brought me to Kemaman Café. I start to understand why my aunt said Kemaman are having a lot of nice cozy Cafes like these. This is a really nice place. The portion was satisfactory, and the drinks were good. I had fresh lemon, and I knew right away the content of sugar water was minimal. Also, the lady boss seemed to be a Coca-Cola fan who collected mainly cans and bottles in 3 cabinets. She might be interested in my coca cola truck you know!

After I went to look for the chapel, I drove out of town to a mini market I spotted on the way into town before. Then I detoured to follow a tourist’s sign board to Pantai Teluk Mat Nik. I found out on the internet today that some people actually referred it as Monica Beach. Sea turtles lay eggs here seasonly. But I was there for some pictures only.



The wave was big! Not quite like anything I’ve seen!

There were a lot of government training centres just off the beach, and a small housing area. Very nice place to live in I would imagine. It was Saturday and not surprisingly there were a lot of people chilling.

Then I went to the mini market, which was just outside of the seaside residential area. Had a stroll, and there was this little kid, when I dropped two packets of potato chips on the floor, and he’d wanted to pass, he just picked them up and put them back on shelf and then carry on. First thing, he didn’t think of going around me. 2nd, after he picked them up, I said thank you to him, to which he warmly replied “You’re welcome.”

TEXT BOOK! Nice kid! Made my day!

Not a lot of choices at the store but the prices were pretty fair you have to say, even though I’d have to make it all the way up there.

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